The top table is the main table at your reception. It’s where you’ll sit with your brand-new spouse, to enjoy your first meal together as a married couple.
Traditionally, it’s a long(ish) table that faces the rest of the guests: you sit side-by-side rather than opposite each other. Symbolically, it places the happy couple at the centre of the room.
But who should sit there? Well, that’s up to you. There is a traditional way things are done, but many modern couples choose to switch it up. To help you decide, here’s our guide to top-table seating.
Contents
Who sits at the top table at a wedding?
Alternative top table seating ideas
Who sits at the top table at a wedding?
If we’re going by tradition: it’s the happy couple, their parents, and key members of the wedding party (the best man, the maid of honour) who sit at the top table. That’s 6-8 chairs.
The couple sit in the middle of the table. From left to right, here’s the traditional seating order:
- Maid of honour
- Father of the groom
- Mother of the bride
- Groom
- Bride
- Father of the bride
- Mother of the groom
- Best man
You might have noticed that this arrangement alternates between men and women: everyone is seated next to someone of another gender.
Bear in mind that this is a traditional family setup—it won’t reflect everyone’s reality. Consider it as an example of how things can be done.
Really, there’s no set rules: you and your loved ones can sit wherever you like.
Alternative top table seating ideas
So, what are some alternative ideas for top table seating? Here’s some of our favourites.
Just family
If you’ve got a tight-knit family, you might choose to save the top table places for your closest relatives. Parents, siblings, aunts and uncles, cousins—it’s up to you.
Best friends
Or you could choose to fill your top table with your chosen family: your closest friends. Here, you might have another table for your relatives nearby, so they still feel like they’re part of the action.
“King’s table”
For those who prefer to be in and amongst their guests, why not try a King’s table? This is a long, rectangular table that seats many more than the traditional eight—think upwards of 30 people. But in theory, you could fit as many as the space allows.
The happy couple sit in the middle of the table, surrounded by family and friends on all sides. It creates a lovely sociable vibe.
Some celebrations will have multiple King’s tables, where the couple usually sits in the middle of the table that’s placed in the centre of the room. But again, it’s totally up to you.
This arrangement is a popular choice among couples getting married at Kindred. We can have long King’s tables in our airy Hall, for example, or one in our atmospheric Library for more intimate affairs.
Sweetheart table
This is a table reserved for two—you and your person—after you’ve tied the knot. You’ll sit together and enjoy your meal, soaking up the love in the room as you watch over your guests.
But this doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be left out of the fun. You can place the table among or close to the others, so you can easily get up and mingle as you please.
No top table
Or, you might choose to forgo a top table altogether. It’s a more modern and inclusive take on wedding seating—and it removes the need for any politics around who sits on the top table and who doesn’t.
Here, you can sit wherever you like, with whomever you like. But bear in mind that unless you have a sweetheart table, you and your partner will need to sit with someone—and this, by default, will likely be considered the top table.
Etiquette and expectations aside, ask yourself: who do you actually want to sit next to? Who do you have the most fun with? This might be a useful starting point when deciding how to arrange your seating.
Your wedding venue
One key factor that will influence your seating plan is your wedding venue.
Whether you’re dreaming of long King’s tables or simply want enough space for all your guests to fit comfortably—your venue’s layout could be the deciding factor for what’s possible.
At Kindred, a much-loved West London wedding venue, we’ve got multiple spaces across our building to suit all sorts of celebrations. Our sophisticated Library is ideal for intimate weddings, while our airy, downstairs Hall can accommodate a larger, late-night knees-up.
We would be delighted to talk with you about possible seating arrangements—and to bring your dream wedding to life.
Cellar, our on-site Hammersmith restaurant will take care of the food, ensuring your guests are extremely well fed and cared for. And did we mention that we have a private bar on each of our three floors?
Take a look through our wedding brochure to learn more about weddings at Kindred. You are also most welcome to come and see the space for yourself, at no obligation. Simply get in touch with our team to arrange it.
