Your wedding day doesn’t have to be the only celebration of you getting married. You might throw a hen or stag do, for instance—or even an engagement party.
Some people choose to have bridal and/or wedding showers, too. But what are they, and what’s the difference between them? Read on to find out.
Contents
What is a wedding shower?
What is a bridal shower?
Wedding shower vs bridal shower: key differences
What is a wedding shower?
A wedding shower is essentially a party to celebrate the happy couple ahead of the big day. Often, they involve giving gifts—party guests might buy something from the couple’s wedding registry.
Rather than with a bridal shower, this sort of shindig celebrates both people in the couple. It’s a great way for friend groups and families to meet and get to know each other ahead of the big day.
Some people consider a wedding shower to be a more modern, inclusive iteration of a bridal shower.
What is a bridal shower?
As the name suggests, a bridal shower is a pre-wedding party that celebrates the bride. It’s a tradition that stems back to the 1880s, where the women in the bride’s life would “shower” her with gifts and well-wishes, to help her prepare for married life. Typically, the gifts are to do with setting up a home.
Many consider a bridal shower to be a rite of passage. It’s a way to mark this huge life change while being supported and celebrated by all the women in their life.
Wedding shower vs bridal shower: key differences
The two events sound similar, right? Yet they are separate, distinct celebrations.
A caveat: below, we’re describing how things are typically done with these events. But there’s no fixed rules here—it’s your day and you can have whichever celebrations you want, in whichever manner you want.
Who hosts it?
Traditionally, a bridal shower is hosted by the bridal party. Though because today, the bridal party is also often saddled with sorting the hen do, it’s common for family members on the bride’s side to step in and help. Again, there’s no rules: anyone close to the bride who wants to help arrange the event certainly can.
Whereas a wedding shower can pretty much be planned by anyone: family, friends, groomsmen or people in the bridal party.
When does it happen?
You could throw either a bridal or wedding shower in the weeks or months before the wedding.
If we’re being more specific and talking about time of day, that depends on the sort of event you’re having.
For instance, a low-key shower with a smaller group might be perfectly suited to brunch. But if you wanted to have some wedding-themed activities as well, you may need to set aside an entire afternoon.
These sorts of events aren’t usually late night affairs. Though there’s no rule against that, if that’s what you want: it’s your day.
What activities does it involve?
Games are a really popular choice for bridal showers. Because these events are an established tradition, they often follow more of a schedule.
During a bridal shower, you would probably have some food or cake, open the gifts, and play some games, for example. Historically, the bride has opened the gifts in front of everyone, but this tradition has relaxed. You don’t have to do it if you prefer not to.
Some games that are popular include Mr and Mrs—where the bride is quizzed about her partner, and her responses are compared to their pre-recorded answers—and pin the veil on the bride.
Wedding showers are more relaxed, so there’s no set games or activities that are typically done. These are often lower-key affairs where everyone simply enjoys each other’s company.
Do both people in the couple attend?
This is an easy one. For bridal showers, it’s only the bride who attends.
But with a wedding shower, both people in the couple come along.
Who do guests bring gifts for?
Gift-giving is perhaps one of the most iconic elements of a bridal shower. After all, it’s been a part of the tradition for centuries. Here, as you’ve likely guessed, the gifts are given to the bride.
Because historically, getting married meant literally setting up a new home with a spouse, people usually gave the bride gifts to make this transition easier. But today, it’s more common for couples to already be living together. So, they probably don’t need a bunch of plates or crockery.
Instead, gifts might be self-care products or family heirlooms being passed down. Some brides choose to have no gifts at all.
But if you are bringing a bridal shower gift, does that mean you also need to bring a wedding gift? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. It depends on what the couple have specified in their invitations. If it doesn’t say not to bring a gift, you can assume that you should bring something. For a bridal shower, it’s common to give something smaller, whereas the larger gift can be saved for the big day.
What about a wedding shower? Again, because this is a more modern development, there’s no set rules. But because this event is designed to celebrate both people in the couple, the gift should be for both of them.
Can I have both?
If you want to, yes. There’s nothing to say that you can’t have both a wedding and a bridal shower.
Though do bear in mind that if you would invite the same people to both, they may feel a bit of event fatigue. Plus, attending both events plus your wedding means that they would give you three gifts—which may feel like a bit of an ask. Not to mention that those in the wedding party will also need to attend their respective stag and hen parties.
Consider what the purpose of these events is when planning. Why do you specifically want to have both? How will the events be different?
Your wedding venue
But it’s the big day that matters most. And choosing the right venue is one of the most important planning decisions you’ll make.
At Kindred, a West London wedding venue, we’re known for our unique interiors and warm service. We’re a heritage venue designed with a modern touch: we’re got high, arched ceilings as well as plush sofas, elegant pops of colour, and cosy, speakeasy-style lounges.
When it comes to the food, our in-house Hammersmith restaurant, Cellar, will be at your disposal. Plus, on each floor of our building, there’s a private bar stocked with characterful wines, top-shelf spirits, crisp beers, and delightful non-alcoholic cocktails. Your guests will certainly be well fed and cared for.
With three floors in our building, we’ve got plenty of spaces to suit all manner of celebrations: whether you’re wanting to host a beautifully intimate wedding or a big, late-night dance party.
Take a look at our wedding brochure to learn more about having your wedding with us here at Kindred. You are also most welcome to come and visit the space for yourself, at no obligation. Simply get in touch with our team to arrange it.
